Are Your Friends Trustworthy?
“A friend in need is a friend indeed,” is the old cliché showing that someone who is there with you in time of trouble or hardship is a true friend. We all have our friends who we have gained in a number of ways, whether through school, church, work or even your neighbourhood who can be our trusted accomplices in life.
On some occasions though the friends we choose might be the ones to betray us when the situation becomes convenient. We all want to avoid friends who will let us down or abuse our trust at the end of the day.
Can you trust your friends?
Making wise choices for friends is hard but these are a few means one can use to identify trustworthy friends.
Truth – Your friend should not be afraid to tell you the truth about anything. Whether it is an honest opinion about an outfit you are wearing, your stance in an argument or something they may or may not have done, honesty is an essential criteria for trustworthiness. Your friend who tells the truth in all situations shows courage and respect for your relationship.
Compassion – A friend should have compassion for you in different situations. This does not equal encouraging you in negative or harmful behaviour but shows that your friend is there for you and willing to hold your hand or give you the swift and respectful kick in the bum necessary to get you back on the appropriate track. You don’t want a friend who does not try to see or understand your motivations. Their compassion for you means they are less likely to work against your interests or betray you.
Gossip-Free – It is fun for some to have a good gossip about some mutual “friend” or acquaintance. However, this can be a sign that the person might not be the one you want holding your secrets in confidence. This is especially the case where you see them gossiping and stating negative things about someone and then smiling and being cosy with same person. It would be hard to trust they are not doing the same thing to you.
Responsible – ‘A promise is a comfort to a fool’. However, you want a friend who follows up on the promises and assurances he or she has given to you. You need to trust your friend is a person of his or her word. One of the joys of friendship is having people you can depend on who can depend on you in return and it can easily be frustrating to be in a one way relationship with someone who is irresponsible and unreliable.
Compatible – Does this person share your sense of humour, values and is generally amenable to your personality? I have been in one serious friendship where we were so different that it eventually tore our relationship apart. It seems that opposites can be great friends but that is if the persons in the friendship accept each other as they are. Compatibility is essential for any strong relationship or friendship by making the friends more likely to work in each other’s interest and understand each other.
Strong friendships are based on mutual trustworthiness and finding such a relationship is one of the most rewarding things in life so make sure you have people in your life that you can trust.